Well this past Monday, my sweet, most precious Cam turned 1. The day was filled with so many emotions, but most of them were of graciousness. I'm so grateful that I've been able to experience this past year of my life with the best baby. If I had been asked a year ago today if I were grateful about the hand I'd been dealt, I would have laughed in your face and thought...Really, why would I be grateful about watching my baby laying in a hospital bed going through so much already? But now I'm ashamed of the old me. A year ago, I was doubting God, feeling sorry for myself, and somewhere deep down wishing it was just a bad dream and that I would wake up and go back to my old life. Now, I'm so amazed at what Cameron has taught me. I feel that when God chose to give us Cam that he was blessing us and not cursing us. Cameron has been the most amazing testament to courage and strength. He has been the one to save me and not the other way around!!
A year ago, I was perplexed as to how us having Cam was fair. I felt so selfish and jealous. I remember feeling like I just wanted to crawl in a hole and never come out, but yet putting on a happy face in front of others so that they wouldn't think I was some kind of horrible mother. I wanted everything to end. I'm different now. I look back a year ago when Cam was so helpless and precious laying there in the little hospital crib. So many wires, and so many machines helping him stay alive. It was devastating. Now I look at Cam and am amazed at how well he is doing and how much he has taught me. I am now a nurse, doctor, geneticist, physical therapist, and at the bottom of my resume a mother! I hate and love both at the same time all the things I've been forced to learn about, but I'm stronger and more aware because of it. Would I give it all up for Cam not to have to go through everything he has and will...100% but that isn't our journey! Cam is Cam, and I'm the most blessed mommy in the world that he belongs to me!
Cameron Joseph is one now, and here is what he is doing:
He can sit all by himself unaided.
He can get from a sitting to a floor position.
He can stand holding onto a table or other objects.
He SMILES all the time!!
He babbles alot...no words yet
He can reach for us to pick him up
He can clap my hands
He can clap his hands if you hold one
He can give kisses...and they rock!
He smacks his lips by imitation
He can turn pages on a book
He loves to eat
He is eating stage 3 baby food, and frozen yogurt is his favorite
He loves baths and splashing the water
He loves laying on mommy and daddy's bed
He loves looking at himself in the mirror
He can hold his own bottle...but usually won't because he likes me to
He gives great high fives!
He smiles when you hold up a camera and say cheese!
He is the best sleeper ever, and is very laid back and chill. He has the best temperament and is the most beautiful child in the world!
So here's to you Cameron Joseph. For one year down and many more to come. You are the best thing that has every happened to me and I want you to know I couldn't love something or someone more than I love you! You have my heart little boy, and I'm so glad I get to be your mommy!
